I've always been the kinda girl...

As I sit here listening to some sweet Beatmania J-Techno, I'm beginning to feel more and more unsure about my decision. There are so many factors going into this transition. And so much I feel could go wrong. I need to sort out the negative, so I can somehow assess the situations and find the positive.


Japanese lifestyle is very unique and different and structured. I'm used to coming and going as I please. Staying out late whenever I wish, with just a quick call home. Bringing home friends any day of the week. I know these are all things that must quickly come to an end. But not only do I need to stop doing some things, I need to START DOING others as well. My life as I know it, will be flipped 180 degrees.
I will need to start coming home by dinner time. I will need to sleep and wake early. I will need to be more social with the family. I will need to turn off the dramas, turn off the music, and open a text book. I will need to be selfless, and make sacrifices. Do things I don't necessarily WANT to, but NEED to, for the sake of myself or my family. Clean without being told. NOT go clubbing in Tokyo every weekend. I don't want my family to hate me!!
It will be a rough transition, but this is not impossible for me. I can do this. I know I can...
Then there is also the fact I will have to speak Japanese. All the time. I read and write pretty well I think, but I can't speak Japanese. I'll just have to keep in mind that with practice, I WILL get better.

My semester in TIU ends in mid-December, with spring starting in March. In this 3 month time span, a friend in oosaka has offered me a place to stay. I'm so incredibly excited about being able to do this. Live with a great friend, in a city I adore. But I'm SO afraid I'll overstay my welcome. I LOVE HER TO DEATH, but I don't want her to be afriad to tell me no! >_<

I'm sure there are numerous other things that could go wrong, but I need to remain positive. I don't want to leave this country believing that nothing will go as planned. I'll work hard!

Don't forget, I'll be updating about my host family and visa process as soon as the papers come in! :)

1 comment:

Isa-Bell said...

Hey Jess! I'm sure if you really try you can do all those things. And I'm sure your host family will understand if for the first couple of weeks you aren't used to being 100% perfect host daughter. You'll adjust, and then you'll love it. :) And they will also help you speak Japanese too! :) just try to look at the positive and everything will work out! Its your dream, and its coming true.